There are fewer words with more baggage attached to them than "relationships." By about age 30 or so, both men and women alike have experienced a lifetime of romantic ups-and-downs, and have spent countless hours attempting to maintain a decent love life. Given how many people fail at this task, it comes as no surprise that several relationship-related cottage industries have sprung up over the years, each claiming to offer help with matters of the heart.
So why do loving couples split apart so often? Obviously, there are many answers to this question, and the reason for a failed relationship can vary widely from couple to couple. Despite this handicap, there are some culprits that seem to appear more often than others. Below are some of the potholes that frequently derail relationships:
Power Struggles - Does it seem that your significant other dominates the decision making process in your relationship? In many relationships, one person will assume total control of the couple's finances, and dictate what the couple will do and who they will associate with. This can lead to resentment on the part of the powerless partner, and can torpedo the relationship.
Jealousy - This is a big one - many people wind up feeling some jealousy toward their significant other. There can be a number of reasons for this jealousy; some people envy their partner's talents, others cast a suspicious eye toward their lover's friends. In many cases, relationship jealousy is totally unfounded. For example, some people might convince themselves that their partner is cheating on them with an ex, despite having no real proof to back up their accusations.
Clashing Personalities - Ever hear the phrase "opposites attract"? Basically, it's the idea that the people with totally different personalities can fall in love and maintain a healthy relationship. It's a nice story, but often times it's completely at odds with reality. Partners with clashing personalities can easily wind up clashing in real life. A hard-charging overachiever, for instance, may chastise his/her laid-back partner.
The Spark Fizzles Out - Sometimes, you don't need to consult a relationship expert (or a marriage counselor if you've tied the knot) to figure out why your relationship is headed south. After spending years dealing with your significant other's quirks, idiosyncrasies and shortcomings, many people are just simply sick of their partners. Some couples (and their personalities) just weren't meant to be, at least long term.
Together as One - What's the opposite of losing interest in your partner? The answer is being overly attached to your lover. This might occur if one partner's personality lacks self-confidence and self-esteem, and seeks to fix these deficiencies by holding onto his or her lover liked a prized possession. Of course, such a relationship is unhealthy for both parties involved. If you find yourself in such a situation, try to sort the issue out with your partner.
Constant Nit-picking - Nobody's perfect, and this fact inevitably extends to your romantic life. Learning to live with your partner's various minor imperfections (provided they are, in fact, minor) is simply a part of life. Though his or her personality might test your patience, try and just let the little things go.
Different Maturity Levels/Priorities - Suppose you've reached the age where you would like to settle down, have kids and raise a family. Of course, there's nothing wrong with this - so long as your significant other is thinking the same thing. If the person you're dating still has the personality of an 18-year old (even though they're on the wrong side of 30), problems are bound to arise.
Even if your partner has his or her act together, sometimes your interests still don't mesh. Your boyfriend/girlfriend might be focused on establishing their career, and has put off matrimony and procreation for a later date.
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