Thursday, January 10, 2013

Interracial Dating: Debunking The Stereotypes

I fully realize that this will probably be my most controversial article but it begs discussion because, honestly, there aren't many others that are brazen enough to take the topic on. So, with that said, let's go there.

It's 2013 and interracial dating is still plagued by negative stereotypes. Some may find that hard to believe but it's definitely a truism. Wondering why? Well, I'm just going to cut straight to the chase here. It's all about sex and status. When people associate stereotypes with interracial dating those are the two long-standing ones that usually come to mind. Let's talk about them candidly, shall we?

Sex has traditionally been a hot button issue when it comes to interracial dating and marriage and it is largely fueled by the myths that we're all very aware of but don't discuss openly. Without being crass or graphic, let's just say that some demographic groups are assumed to be more sexually aggressive or working with superior equipment. Other groups are assumed to be seeking those things out because they can't find them in their own groups. While these assumptions are absolutely myths the stereotypes associated with them tend to drive negative thoughts about interracial couples.

Let's delve a bit further. Imagine you see an interracial couple of a black male and a white female. Now, you may belong to those who really don't care about what prompted their affection for each other but are happy to see it. Or, you might belong to the group that assumes that the couple is together for the same kind of reasons that bring other couples together, like common interests and genuine attraction based on feelings. Or, you might belong to that group of small-minded people that assume she's with him because he's probably packing and she wants to irritate daddy or that he's with her because she's docile, into kinky stuff and wants to spite white people.

Status is the other automatic assumption that comes to mind. It's not uncommon to find people who think that the motives behind interracial dating are none other than to climb the social ladder. The thinking here is that certain demographic groups are better positioned to have more material wealth and higher social status than others. And, obviously, the assumption is that other groups may not be able to find higher social and economic status within their own groups so they, in turn, seek it out externally. Again, these are complete falsehoods that drive negative stereotypes when it comes to interracial dating.

Humor me with another scenario. This time let's make the couple an Asian man and a black woman. Do you subscribe to the school of thought that they are together for all the right reasons or that she's with him because he probably has money? And to bring everything full circle with the other half of the equation... that he's with her because she's a freak in bed?

The reason that these stereotypes need to die once and for all is because America has finally become the melting pot that it was always touted to be. White privilege and "old money" still exist but high society is starting to become diversified because the only color that really matters is green. If you have it, you're in. And sexual behavior is changing in general across the country, driven by the proliferation of a carefree attitude about carnal knowledge in pop culture. Stereotyping interracial dating is just plain ol' dumb in today's society. Don't get me wrong, there probably are some people that play into the stereotypes and date for those superficial reasons that I just described. But if you talk to the majority of interracial couples you'll find that most of them just happened to find other, whether they have preferences or not, and are together for the same kind of reasons as their non-interracial counterparts.

No matter how hard some may try to denigrate love with prejudiced and lascivious thinking it is, in fact, blind. Interracial couples are the beautiful proof of that.

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