Thursday, October 25, 2012

The Top Two Reasons It Is Better to Text, Not Call, a Girl You Just Met

You can't call a girl you just met anymore. Calling relies on you and your new girl both being available to talk at the same time. If she's busy when you call, she probably won't answer. Then, if she doesn't answer and you leave a voicemail, there's a good chance she won't listen to it. In fact, a lot of people, myself included, just don't listen to voicemail anymore. Even if she does listen to voicemail, the probability that she'll call you back is extremely low.

So, what do you do? Text. It's that simple; just text.

Texting has two serious advantages over a phone call:

1. Text is "Asynchronous Communication"

What does that mean? It means you both don't have to be communicating at the same time for it to work. So, for example, you can send her a text on Monday morning asking if she wants to have drinks Monday night. She might be at work when you text her, check out your text at lunch and text you back that she's available. Say you choose to call her instead. You call her Monday morning, and she listens to your message at lunch (a small miracle, by the way). She calls you back, but you're at work. She leaves a message, but you don't listen to your message until later, say 3 pm. You call her back, but she's at work, you leave a message, but at this point, she's not even hearing your message until she's done with work, is tired, and has been trying to get a hold of you all day, she's tired, doesn't have time to prepare and is just kind of "over" the whole meeting up with you Monday night thing. She might call you back, and maybe she even agrees to meet up with you later in the week, but you've totally lost momentum, and the chances that she'll flake are high.

2. Text is Low Commitment

People don't like commitment, so if you're asking someone you just met to commit to a phone call, you're asking for a lot. When you ask for a lot, there's always a chance that you won't get it. Besides, nobody wants to get on the phone with a boring person. Now, you might just want to call her to set up a date, but she doesn't know that. People always think of the worst possible scenario, and you can bet that, at some point, she's been on the phone with a boring guy who talked her ear off. Who wants that? With text, you can send her a quick text, she can decide if and when to text you back, and you can both handle the logistics around meeting up without having an in-depth, long conversation. Besides, you want to save any long conversations for when you're actually with her.

So, we've established that text is the best way to reconnect with a girl you just met. But, texting, like anything else, can be done well or poorly. In order to be successful with women today, you need to learn what to text a girl.

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