Online dating is not the taboo that it use to be. At one time, it was thought that online dating was only for single, lonely, desperate people. This however is no longer the case, as people from all walks of life can be found on the dating sites. Online dating attracts roughly 1.4 billion consumers globally.
There are literally hundreds of sites to choose from, depending on what you are looking for ranging from simply just dating or if you are looking for your soul mate and want to get married. While most are paid sites where the members pay a monthly fee, some are free to use. This review is about one of those free sites, PlentyofFish or simply POF.
In 2003, Markus Frind, the founder and owner, launched PlentyofFish as a completely free online dating site and today has over 45 million users worldwide with 20 million messages sent per day, 40, 000 new signups per day, and over 1.26 million average daily visits per month!
According to the media tracker comScore, PlentyofFish draws a staggering 2.8 billion page views per month, compared to 723 million for Match.com, and has 6.3 million unique visitors, about the same as its Dallas-based arch-nemesis. And the newly launched PlentyofFish mobile app, Frind claims, has been downloaded by one million users.
Personally having been a member of both, free and paid sites, I have found that PlentyofFish offers the exact same services, for free, that other online dating sites charge for. There is however a great misconception out there that says you will find a better quality person on a paid site than you would on a free site and that is simply not true. Sammers and creeps have credit cards too and you will find them on any paid site, just as much as you would a free dating site.
Comparing PlentyofFish to Paid Online Dating Sites
Most online dating sites, both free and paid, will allow you to post a profile with photos, for free. Some paid sites will even allow you to see who has viewed your profile, but not much more than that. One very popular paid online dating site for Black people will allow you to see who has viewed you, allow you to send a flirt, or add someone to your favorites, for free, but anything else and you have to pay for it. Without paying, you cannot see who has flirted with you, or who has added you as a favorite, nor can you see who has sent you a message, let alone reading it or replying. Also, unless you are a paid member, you cannot chat with anyone or even see who is trying to chat with you. These are all paid features. It is absolutely pointless to become a free member on a paid site.
There is however, another popular paid dating site for Blacks that will allow you to communicate, by email, with a member who has upgraded to premium. Otherwise, if both of you are free members, the most you can do is to see who has viewed you, and send them a wink. They advertise that as a free member, you can send one free message to a member. However, what they don't tell you is that you will have to choose from a selection of subject lines and unless one of you are a paid member, this is all they will see - the subject line. In order to see the full message or reply to a message, one of you must be a paid member.
Then you have one of the most expensive paid sites that is completely useless to a free member, even on their supposed "Free Weekends." You cannot even see who has view your profile unless you are a paid member. And you can forget about any kind of communication. Some of these expensive paid sites promote some sort of Matching System however, PlentyofFish has used a free "Behavioral Matching Engine" for years that was featured on a 2007 segment of The Today Show. Frind says, "years before any other dating sites even knew that kind of stuff was possible. I feed it with nearly 20 billion pieces of data."
What Can You Do With A Free POF Membership:
* You can create your profile and pretty much write what you want, within reason. You can be reported by other users for inappropriate content. However, unlike other paid sites where your profile greeting and photos have to go through a screening process and possibly get deleted, your profile greeting and photos get posted to the site and is immediately viewable by others. No more waiting for your profile or pictures to be approved.
* You can communicate by system email and by system chat, completely free. You can also set restrictions to your profile which will keep certain people from even being able to contact you. For example, if someone is legally separated and you have restricted all married persons, then that person will not be able to contact you. However, if you contact someone in a restricted category first, then they can contact you.
* Basic search and Advanced search engines that will allow you to find exactly who you are looking for. You can specify about their Ethnicity, smoking or drinking habits, their intentions of whether they are just looking for a date, a long-term relationship, or even those who want to get married.
* "Meet Me" feature that allows you to say Yes, No, or Maybe to someone's profile. If you said Yes, they will be sent an email letting them know that someone wants to meet them. Also, if both of you said Yes, both of you will be notified of the Match. One caveat about this feature is that you do not get to choose whose profile you will look at. They are shown to you in random order and each person will know that you have viewed their profile.
* You can participate in the POF Forums, completely free. As a community of more than 45 million individual opinions and ways of experiencing the world, their forums are just another great platform that allows the users to come together to communicate and share with each other. Here you can begin a discussion, pose a question, offer your feedback, and start connecting with other local singles right in the forum. You can also have others review your profile for effectiveness.
* Announcements of Events for local singles in your area, including "Meet and Mingles". A free membership does however have ads on the page, and in fact, this is how they make their money. PlentyofFish's earnings, generated solely from advertising, are in the tens of millions.
PlentyofFish also has Upgraded features for a fee. With a paid, upgraded membership, you will be able to access your Ultra Match, see if your emails were read or deleted, experience POF ad-free, find out the date and time someone viewed your profile, and see who viewed your profile and you voted yes/maybe on. However, as you can see, from everything you can do for free, an upgraded profile is not really necessary.
Online Dating Tips for a Safe and Pleasurable Experience
This review would not be complete without some tips for safety and a pleasurable experience on any online dating site. If you were to do a search for PlentyofFish, you will find some negative reviews but I believe this all depends on the person's approach. With that being said, here are some things for you to consider when registering on any online dating site:
1. Be the person you would like to meet. If honesty and integrity are important to you, then do not lie in your profile. Also, just like lying, don't post photos of yourself that are 10 years old and then be surprised when the person meets you in person and wants nothing further to do with you. Be Yourself!
2. Treat yourself with respect. If you post provocative or almost nude photos of yourself then in your profile you say that you want a "God Fearing" man who respects you, guest who you are more likely to attract? The man who most likely wants a one night stand and who does not respect you.
3. Be honest with yourself about what you will or will not accept. This has nothing to do with compromise. For example, if you would prefer a non-smoker, don't settle for a smoker when that is not who you really want. Do not settle for anyone and most importantly, do not allow anyone to settle for you.
4. Beware of Scammers. Here are some signs that you may be dealing with a scammer. First, on a free site, such as PlentyofFish, it is free to use the system email to communicate so stay away from anyone who sends you their personal email address, in their first communication to you, and wants you to write them or who request your personal email address. Giving out your personal information is not necessary, at that point.
This also brings up the subject of profiles with no photos. They may say if you send me your email address, I will send you a photo. Don't do it! Granted, there may be legitimate reasons why someone does not post a photo but generally, I shy away from those types of profiles.
Second, if you receive a first message that is just glowing about how beautiful or handsome you are, then they proceed to tell you all about themselves, which is different information than what is on their profile, more than likely, this is a message that has been copied and pasted to hundreds of people. This may or may not be a scammer, but it is so impersonal that it is not even worth pursuing.
Third, if you receive a message that is in broken English and the style of writing is different from what is written in the profile, more than likely, you have a scammer. One thing I have noticed with my share of scammers is that they will not answer a direct question. And the most popular type of scammer is a widow / widower.
5. Most importantly, TRUST Your Instincts. This is so very important and can save you a lot of heartache. When you are viewing a profile and you immediately get an uncomfortable feeling, listen! You may think this is a little "woo woo" but the more you trust your instincts, the sharper they become and the less chance you have of being scammed. It doesn't matter how beautiful she is or how handsome he is, that feeling that something is not right is coming from a bonafide source. Don't forget, there are thousands of "Fake" profiles, along with fake photos to match, on both free and paid sites.
6. And finally, be polite. I respond to every message I receive, even if it is just to say something like this, "Thank you for your message. However, I don't believe we are a match but I wish you all the best in finding the one who is right for you." I have never had anyone come back with a nasty reply. Mostly, they either do not reply any further or they reply reciprocating their well wishes for my success. I have learned that people just want to be treated with respect and that is not hard to do.
If you follow these tips, you can have a safe and pleasant visit on PlentyofFish or any online dating site. I wish you the best in finding what you are looking for whether it is just friendship or your soul mate.
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