Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Texting Women - When a Good Thing Goes Bad

Texting women. Why do so many guys get this dead wrong in their approach? Texting women can be a great way to further advance things, but if you do it the way that the average guy does, you are not really doing yourself any favors at all. See, texting a woman can brighten up her day when it is done right, but it can also make her feel annoyed and agitated when it is done wrong. And I have to tell you, just from talking to the many women that I know, most guys end up annoying and agitating women. Especially the ones that get advice on how to text a woman from the internet.

Why is that?

Because of the very simple, yet very misunderstood principle that sending a woman text messages is not going to make her get all hot and bothered for you UNLESS she already feels attracted to you. And yet, most men when they text a woman, use it as almost a way to pick her up, when that is about the worst way to use it.

Here's the scenario:

You get your hands on a woman's cell phone number but did not have much time to actually interact with her. Maybe she gave it to you in a blur at a club. Maybe you know one of her friends and they gave it to you. No matter what, you did not have much time at all to build any rapport or make her feel attracted to you.

You get on the web, grab some list of 10 flirty things to say to a woman through text messaging and off you go. Do you REALLY think that this is going to make her want you? If you do, you may want to get to know women just a little better, lol.

This is when a good thing goes bad. Technology today makes it dead easy to get into contact with people. That can be a great thing when you use it right. It can be horrible when you use it wrong. And in the scenario above, it is using it wrong.

Here's a better scenario:

You are out at a club and you start talking to a woman. You flirt with her, she is flirting back with you. You are touching her and she is touching you back. Everything is going great. Problem is, the logistics of the situation don't allow the two of you to get alone or to leave the club together. So, you get her number, she gets yours.

You text her back the next day with a little blurb that carries on the conversation from the night before. You get her back into that feeling that she had when she was around you. You use this opportunity to call her. You talk for a little while, build things up even more and then line up a day or night when the two of you can get together.

That is how to use text messages to get real results with women. You don't need to send cheesy little messages to a woman you barely know. It won't get you anywhere and if it does, you gotta kind of question what kind of woman she is, lol. If she hooks up with you off of a couple of messages back and forth, how often does she do that?

You get much BETTER results when she is already attracted to you...

Think about it like this. Would you call up a woman and tell her something cheesy about how hot she is? Probably not. So why would you send it in a text? That kind of thing only works AFTER she already is into you.

Real World Situation...

This is a pretty common, real world situation. I was talking to a woman I know about how girls have so many phone numbers stored in their cell phones. Mainly, I was busting on her about it. She pulled out her cell phone and took a look. There were over 150 numbers on that thing. Now, this is a woman I am friends with.

She's definitely hot, fun to be around, etc. Guys like her the minute that they see her. So, she gets a lot of guy's numbers.

So, anyways, we are looking through all of the names and numbers in there, and I am pointing to random ones. More than half of the ones I pointed to... she had no clue on who they were. She wither did not know at all, or she just knew them as "that cheesy guy from that club."

Do you think that any of these guys that she does not even remember or refers to as that "cheesy guy from the club" has a shot if they send her a flirty text message?

Not at all.

This is common nowadays. Women almost always have more numbers stored in their cell phones than guys do. And if you send some random text message to a woman who really does not remember you or has no feelings at all, no matter how flirty it is... it is not going to have much any positive effect on her.

It might have a NEGATIVE effect, but that gets you NADA.

Anyways, my friend?

She wound up deleting at least a dozen guy's numbers when she realized... she did not know who they were.

Before you pick up your cell phone and copy down some "super effective" text message that you find somewhere or that one of your buddies swears works on all women, ask yourself... Does she even remember me?

If the answer is NO... then you might as well put down the cell phone and work on building up attraction with a woman face to face. It will get you MORE dates, more hookups, and MORE confidence.

Then, once you have your hooks into a woman and she is really feeling YOU... by all means, use text messages to brighten her day, make her think about you, or even get "hot" for you. It all comes down to timing, really.



This article is brought to you by Relationships Advice Blog.

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