Most people would agree that men who know how to flirt are likely to enjoy more success when it comes to dating. But it might surprise many to know that the same goes for swinger dating and even for success at adult parties. This is because those who have never participated in swinger or adult dating, imagine that both parties and dates have rules of social conduct that completely disregard the ones that apply to mainstream dating. Whilst adult parties and dates offer a social environment where a philosophy of virtually total sexual liberation exists and where even overt sexual behaviour in public is acceptable, this atmosphere of permissiveness has no bearing on the other requirements of social-sexual behaviour. Flirting and seduction skills are consequently as much a part of the adult dating scene as they are in mainstream dating.
Any man who thinks he can be successful on an adult, no strings, date or at an adult party without flirting is doomed for disappointment. What's more, most men accept that there is an art to flirting. Some believe that it is an art they are already well versed in. Others believe it to be a natural talent which one has either been born with or not. Then there are the men who understand that it is a skill which can be developed and refined through learning and application.
Whatever the nature of the type dating involved, men need to understand that they are playing a game and that a positive mental outlook is the first requirement for winning the game. Approaching a woman, whether as a prospective dating partner or to join in the adult fun with her group at a swinger's party, is doomed to failure without this positive mindset.
The men who posses it adopt an air of confidence. They believe in themselves and they believe that a successful outcome is always likely. Such men tend to consider the world to be their own personal playground but more importantly they are not the least bit afraid of being knocked off their pedestal from time to time. For them rejection is merely another step towards getting what they want.
A man who attends a goes into any form of dating activity with a negative mental outlook is someone who constantly has doubts and fears at the back of his mind. When he approaches women, he is likely to reveal his negativity in both subtle and more obvious ways. The typical flow of negative thoughts that run through his mind are likely to form questions like these:
- "I might say the wrong thing or even run out of things to say."
- "If she says no in front of the group she's with, I won't know what to say and I'll feel really embarrassed."
- "She's really quite stunning and will probably think I'm not good enough looking for her"
Men who believe that you are born with the ability to flirt successfully may also believe that they are amongst the lucky ones, in which case they are also likely to adopt a positive mindset and in all probability they will enjoy success in approaching women. But men who do not have the ability whilst retaining the belief that skill in flirtation is an inborn talent aren't ever going to give themselves a chance to change. They risk going through life without ever being successful in seducing women. Subscribing to online adult dating sites or attending adult parties isn't going to change things for them. Instead they need to challenge the belief that flirting is an inborn talent and, understanding that it isn't, to seek out ways to acquire the necessary skills and underlying self confidence. The men who understand that it is a skill which can be developed and refined through learning and application are already a step ahead. There are actually many courses that teach you how to flirt successfully and seduce women, available on the Internet these days and most have free introductions which will help you to decide which one is the best course for you. It really doesn't make any difference whether you are more likely to be making use of the skills within the adult swinger dating or mainstream dating environment. Once learnt you can practice and hone them anywhere.
This article is brought to you by Relationships Advice Blog.
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