Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Why Funny Guys Get The Girls

All of us have seen a funny guy talking to a lady. The funny man will say things to make her laugh, giggle and blush. But why is this a trait that makes a man so irresistible to the ladies?

The biggest reason why women find funny men so attractive is that they are so confident. It is known fact that most women are attracted to a confident man. Confident men can make them feel at ease and safe. Most women are looking for someone they can rely on and who can look after them or their children if needed. A confident man is something that helps indicate to them that these needs can be met.

Now that we have established what makes a funny man so attractive you are probably wondering how you can be that guy. Being the 'funny guy' may not be as easy as you think. Being funny is something that takes time and a lot of effort to become. The first thing you need to master is increasing your confidence because people are more likely to laugh if you're confident. The first step in becoming more confident is to work on your appearance and transform yourself into something that you're proud of. This will surely score you points with the ladies also. There are lots of guides on the internet as well as books on how to increase your confidence. If you are not a very confident person then I suggest you do some reading as it will help you in all aspects of your life.

Another way to become a funnier person is to surround yourself with humor. The more you see and hear things that are funny, the more you will understand the art of humor. There are lots of funny pictures websites out there and you can look at the social media shares to gauge how funny a picture is. Another thing to look at is funny videos on popular video viewing websites. If you look at the amount of up votes something has then you can see how popular that type of humor is. Additionally there are lots of funny comedians who do stand-up shows that you could pick up some tips from.
One of the major things to avoid when trying to be funny around women is making fun of them. A little bit of teasing is not so bad but you have to be very careful not to hurt their feelings. No one likes being made fun of. Try to put yourself in their shoes and try to understand how they may feel when you make certain jokes. An easy thing to do instead is to make jokes as your own expense but make sure they're not too serious. You don't want them to mistake you making fun of yourself for complaining due to low confidence.

The overall most important thing you can ever do to achieve success with women is to practice. You could approach women when you're out shopping or getting some food. Drop a few light hearted jokes and see what works. You have nothing to lose if you don't know the girl and you may even end up chatting and becoming friends or more! Always make sure to remember that not every girl will like you or want to be your friend. It is important to not let it affect your confidence and self-esteem. There are plenty more women out there who would love to meet someone like you and would find your jokes funny.

How to Attract a Man and Make Him Feel Addicted to You

You've got some pretty high aspirations because not only do you want to know what it is that you have to do to attract a man, you also want to know what you can do to make him feel like he is addicted to you. It's good to have those kinds of aspirations because it means that you think highly of yourself and you know that you are a good woman who deserves to find the happiness in a relationship that you would like to have. It doesn't have to be all that hard to attract a guy you like and then make him feel almost like he is addicted to you.

Here are some tips that are sure to help you do just that:

1. First things first - you have to find a way to get his attention.

Having a crush on a guy or thinking that he is cute and you'd like to date him is one thing, actually making that become a possibility is another. What you are going to have to do is to try to find a good way to get his attention. You don't want to attract his attention for all of the wrong reasons, so you can't just do anything that comes to mind. You have to put some thought into this if you are going to attract his attention and keep him feeling curious and interested in you.

2. You have to be able to make him feel like he is having a lot of fun being around you.

Once you have his attention, you definitely need to do what you can to make him feel like being around you is better than just about anything else that he could be doing. This is the way to slowly make him feel like he has to be around you, he wants to be around you. This is the way to make him feel like he is almost becoming addicted to you.

3. You also need to make him feel a little bit of the thrill of having to chase after you.

Too much of this can be a bad thing, just enough can be oh so right. If he feels as though he has to chase after you a little to try to win you over, you are already going to know that he is very attracted to you and that you are getting under his skin in a good way. That's definitely what you want to happen if you want to make him addicted to you.

How to Attract a Girlfriend - You've Got to Be Electrifying

A friend of mine and I have a little inside joke that we tell before we go out to clubs or bars. He'll say, "how are you feeling tonight," and I'll say Electrified. It cracks us up because it kind of sounds corny, but the fact remains that there is some truth in there. Somewhere. One of the things that acts as kind of a repellent to women is when you come across as being just another boring guy, hoping that somehow and in some way, you'll be able to make a woman fall for you. That's not exactly the best state to be in. As corny as it does sound, being electrifying when you go out is going to get you more action than being totally boring.

The sad thing is, most men don't seem to know when they are being boring. Sometimes, I think that they actually think that they are being exciting and electrifying. They'll talk about their boring job and their boring boss and their boring life and somehow feel like they are really bringing something to the table. The bad thing is, the woman that they are talking to has a totally different opinion. She is just bored. However, most women don't say that. They don't come right out and tell you to be more interesting. Instead, they find an excuse to get away. They go to the bathroom, or they say that they have to find their friend, or they turn to the bar tender and talk to him instead.

Here are some tips that will help you become less boring and as a result, make it so much EASIER for you to attract a girlfriend:

1. Don't talk about yourself so much.

One of the secrets for making conversation that is interesting, is that you need to make the other person feel like they are more involved than you are. A good way to do that is to get the woman to talk about herself. It's an easy thing to do, I find that most women don't have a hard time talking about themselves unless they are boring themselves. Yeah, there are women like that out there. I try to stay away from them as much as I can. If you can get her EXCITED while talking about something that she LOVES to talk about - it's not that hard to take that excitement that she is feeling and direct it back at yourself.

2. Actually start to do things in your spare time that are interesting.

You don't have to be a rock star or a millionaire to do interesting things. Really, as long as it SOUNDS interesting, you've already won. For example, you might have some friends who really aren't that good at making music, but since they are a "band," you can truthfully talk about how you hang out with them before a gig and that alone is going to sound kind of interesting. Or, you can do some outdoor activities that don't cost money like hiking. The more things that you can bring to the table in a conversation that sound interesting - the more likely it is that a woman is going to be interested in YOU.

3. Learn how to talk sexually to a woman in a way that totally excites her.

You can't go and talk the way that they do in bad movies where the guys use puns in all of the wrong places or just end up sounding like a creepy little pervert. What you can do is to use words that are sexual, but not really use them in a sexual context. For example, you can tell a story about something that you did recently, but weave it in such a way that it has a sexual undertone to it. When you can do this really well, not only will you attract a woman's attention, but chances are good that she will be a little bit excited just by talking to you.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

A Guide to the Friend Zone When Dating

Attention daters: The Friend Zone is not always a bad thing! We've all had a crush on a male friend at some point or another; maybe you even ended up in a relationship with one of these guys. However, like it or not, male friends are not always going to like you back in the same way you're interested in them.

But wait! This can be a GREAT thing. "How can this possibly be a good thing?" you ask. Let us tell you four ways.

1. Bounce your current dating situation off an actual male, and you may actually get SOLID advice.

Let's face it: Asking your lady friends can be a good idea sometimes. But in reality, women don't always give the best advice to their friends. (Which is why a session with a professional dating coach can be the best decision you make this year.) But if you aren't ready for that, start with a male friend who can actually give you the male perspective on what's going on in your love life; often, it can be extremely insightful!

2. You might find the one guy who can fit in your friend zone, and then you can meet HIS friends.

Most heterosexual men I know aren't really looking to get into a platonic relationship with a woman they actually find attractive and interesting. They usually want to at least get in their pants, and at most get into an awesome relationship. On the off chance that you meet one of the former who actually is interested in forming a friendship with a female (and you enjoy his company but aren't interested in him), Get. Him. In. The. Friend. Zone. Not only did you just gain a new buddy, but he might have some guy friends you could be interested in!

3. The proof is in the pudding.

In a recent study recently of US males:

- 84% say it's possible to have a "just friends" relationship with a girl.

- 83% say it's possible for a girl to switch from someone they just want to be friends with, to a romantic interest, and back to just wanting to be friends.

- 43% say if they have a girlfriend already, it's easier for them to have platonic girl friends.

4. Things aren't the same anymore.

"The belief that men and women can't be friends comes from another era in which women were at home and men were in the workplace, and the only way they could get together was for romance," explained Linda Sapadin, a psychologist in Valley Stream, New York. "Now they work together and share sports interests and socialize together." When Harry Met Sally basically set the potential for male/female platonic friendship back about 25 years. So we're in a whole new era, Dignity Daters!

So, do you have a guy friend in your phone you haven't talked to in a few weeks? Invite him on a platonic bowling date and get his opinion on your new guy. Met a new guy you like but don't love, and he asked you out for beers? Take a chance and go. You never know where it might lead; he might become your new wingman!

Monday, March 18, 2013

Chinese Online Dating: A Leap of Faith

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Why You're Still Single: You're Unknowingly Limiting Your Lifestyle

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Probability and Love: Why Numbers Matter

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Relationship Wisdom: Stonewalling Versus Criticising

In an intimate relationship there are common dynamics of interactions. One of them I deal with in couple clients is the stonewalling versus criticising dynamic. This dynamic is one that can become entrenched in a couple's engagement with each other and lead to severe dissatisfaction with the relationship.

What relationship research shows

Relationship expert Dr John Gottman, who researched couples for the past 40 years, has coined the term of the 'Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse in Relationships', which lead to marital disaster. Two of the four steps are criticism and stonewalling.

According to his research 85% of men are stonewallers where the majority of women are critics. Stonewalling means that the person disengages from the conversation, pretending to still be part of it by being physically present, but giving minimal verbal feedback. Energetically the person has already left the interaction.

The stonewalling-critic dynamic

Often when there is a critic (usually but not exclusively women) and a skilled stonewaller the dynamic quickly starts to run and leads into an unhealthy cycle where one role feeds the other.

The critic starts sending out messages, which might not even be criticism at the beginning. The stonewaller starts to engage as he is usually very sensitive to being criticised and hears any comment as critical. To avoid any further comments or interactions, he intensifies the 'dis-engagement'. This infuriates the critic as all she wants is for him to at least engage and say something. In this moment, the critic might up the ante and actually say something critical, just to get a reaction. At this point the stonewaller will shut down the interactions until the situation has cooled down again.

Influences of personalities

Depending on the personalities involved in this dynamic and how long it takes one or the other to cool down and whether and when they are ready to lead into repair mechanism this dynamic can either very quickly lead into a spiral downward to marital disaster or just be a repeated pattern of a relationship.

Especially when stress levels are up, it is more likely for this dynamic to endanger the relationship as none of the two might have much energy left to lend a hand and start to climb back up to martial harmony.

The way out of the dynamic

Depending on the level of self-awareness and reflection, a couple will easily be able to work together towards harmony. Often what it needs is the ability to allow vulnerability and openness to let each other in what is going on for each side of the dynamic. This especially requires the critic to let go or tone down criticism and for the stonewaller to be ready to engage and be open.

If you as a coupe encounter challenges when trying to repair, make sure to ask a trained and unbiased professional for help.

Saturday, March 16, 2013

Do You Need Help Winning Your Ex Boyfriend Back?

Some women are lucky enough not to encounter any trouble when trying to win their ex boyfriends back. This is mostly because they know exactly what they want, so they approach the process with confidence and end up back in their ex lovers' arms as if nothing tore them apart to begin with. Not every woman is that confident, though. In fact, most women are clueless and worried when it comes to trying to win their ex back.

So, if you are a woman and you need a confidence boost in winning your ex boyfriend back, then here are several suggestions that may come in handy for you:

1. Talk about your feelings through song.

If you have no idea what to say when winning your ex boyfriend back, then try to use songs to tell him how you feel. If you can sing well, then sing him a song. If you can't, then ask somebody else to do it or just play the songs on a media player of some sort, or share a playlist with him through the Internet.

2. Get emotional through text.

Text messages would be another great tool in winning your ex boyfriend back because they can help you tell him how you truly feel. Texts would be especially helpful if you find yourself tongue-tied whenever you actually see your ex in person because nothing will hold you back if you get to process your words and thoughts beforehand. The best part is that you can change your words as needed before sending your text messages, as well.

3. Get friends to help you out.

If you think that your chances of winning your ex boyfriend back are incredibly low at the moment, then you might want to turn to some of your most trusted friends for help. If you and your ex have common friends, then ask one of them to help you win him back. You need to be very careful when it comes to this, though. Ideally, you should make sure that your common friend understands you and only has your best interests at heart. See, if you end up contacting a common friend who sides with your ex, then things could get even worse for you than they already are. In other words, just be very careful in terms of who you trust and what you do. This will ensure that you are met with the utmost success in the end.

Friday, March 15, 2013

Dating Advice For Men - F Is for Friend Zone

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Flowers for Her

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My Boyfriend Is Playing Games With Me - How Do I Make It STOP?

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How Should I Approach My Ex Girlfriend If I Want Her Back?

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Sneaky Psychological Tactics That Can Help You Win Your Ex Boyfriend Back

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Online Dating Success Rate

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When Dating, Keep Your Eye on the Prize

If you are dating or new to the singles scene and thinking about dating, let me ask you this: What are your goals? Are you looking for a life partner? Companionship? A fun sexual relationship? Close your eyes and take a moment to focus on this. When an answer comes to you, read on.

If you've had difficult dating experiences, dating can feel like a hassle; and thus it's easy to lose sight of why you're doing it in the first place. Meeting new people and trying new things can be very satisfying and fun, especially when you're feeling the best about yourself, doing things you enjoy, and-particularly when it feels like a hassle- reminding yourself of your own unique goal. Feeling good about yourself while dating is not always easy. Most have found themselves-sometimes even routinely- in less than perfect dating situations. There's no need to put yourself down when you hit a few road bumps. Instead, reach within to access internal sources of strength to make your dating life the best it can be.

Dating works best for you when you are feeling good about yourself. One reason dating can sometimes be difficult might be because of the negative messages you tell yourself that interfere with your ability to feel your best when connecting with a new person. What are the negative messages you tell yourself that take away from feeling your best? These messages may be related to what you believe dating will be like ("I won't have fun" or "It will be a waste of time.") Other messages may be related to the singles scene ("there are no good wo/men out there. Everyone good is already taken!") Negative self-talk also can be about fear of rejection ("I won't be able to handle rejection") or feeling not great about yourself ("I am not attractive enough"). Whatever flavor of negative self-talk you participate in, you no longer need to fall victim to the voices inside your head. For every negative message you hold there's a positive one you can access to make dating even more enjoyable!

It is natural to have "collected" some negative messages through bad dating experiences and when these messages sound a little bit too loud, it is time to consider using some tools to turn those speakers down. Think about some of the beliefs or attitudes you have about yourself that get in your own way; and make a commitment to attack them forcefully and head-on!

A very effective way to defeat that negative voice in your head is to write down a list of these self-defeating beliefs, words, or attitudes that affect your ability to feel good while dating. Include all of the ways that you put yourself down. Next, read each item to yourself one by one and come up with a positive affirmation that opposes the negative message about yourself. Challenge those negative beliefs by asking yourself, "Is this completely true?" For example, if you tell yourself "I am not attractive enough," write down all of the evidence against this statement. If you listed "there is no one good out there", remind yourself that you are out there dating, aren't you?! If your fear is about your ability to handle rejection, write down "Nothing really consequential will happen to me if I am rejected and- in fact by being rejected-I may even prove to myself that I don't need to fear rejection in the future." If you are sure you won't have fun or will be wasting your time, you can add to your list "I may even meet someone I'd like to see again (!)."

After coming up with your positive affirmations, or pieces of positive self-talk, write them down on index cards to keep around your home, in your wallet or in your car. Don't only look at these before attempting to go out to meet someone or going on a date! Look at these affirmations regularly or at least on a daily basis so that they become your new thinking habits. As you practice internalizing these positive and factual messages, eventually you'll almost certainly find that the positive ones become automatic and triumphantly replace those obsolete negative ones-permanently!

Remember-you are dating for a reason! Have fun! And when dating isn't as fun as you'd like, remember to use this tool, or some of the others that I offer in my book Stage Climbing: The Shortest Path to Your Highest Potential.

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Reconciling With Your Husband

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How Do I Have No Contact With My Ex Girlfriend If I See Her a Lot?

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How to Seduce Women Online - You Can't Be Shy About Meeting in Person

The idea of being able to seduce a woman online is a pleasant one. If you are the kind of guy who doesn't like to go out to clubs where the music is too loud and the bass is so deep you can feel it in your stomach, you might feel like being able to use an online dating site to try and seduce a woman is the best option available. I really can't disagree with you there. I don't mind the club scene myself, but at the same time, online dating sites can be a great place to meet women.

Here is the rub, though.

You can't be afraid to actually meet up with a woman you meet online in person. And you have to know that this is what has to happen when you go into using online dating sites. You can't adopt some phony online persona and then expect that you are going to be able to impress her when you actually get the chance to meet up with her.

Because, let's be real, you really can't seduce a woman online as much as you can meet a woman and then meet up with her and then see if the sparks are really there.

Some guys forget that this has to take place.

They'll concoct a phony story about who they are. Or, they will act really BOLD online when they are nothing but meek in person. You have to remember that whomever it is that she feels like she is falling for when you meet on the web, she has to feel like that is the same guy that she is meeting in person.

It's not that hard to find a woman to talk to online. It's not that hard to build up enough attraction with her so that she wants to meet up with you in person. It's not even that hard to be able to escalate things when you do meet up in person - if you stay congruent throughout the whole process.

I'm always reminded of a mistake that a friend of mine made. He played up this kind of phony version of himself online, acting like he was a little more successful than he really was. When it came time to meet the woman face to face, he had to deal with the reality that he wasn't that successful.

Of course, the sparks were not there when he actually was with her face to face. I don't think it had much to do with his lack of success as it did with the fact that he was clearly portraying himself one way online and then when she met up with him - it was like she was meeting a totally different guy.

See, you have to be able to make that transition where you can actually go out on a date with her, and you need to keep that in mind from the very beginning. Do that and you probably will find that it is actually kind of easy to seduce a woman online.

How to Flirt Effectively With a Woman - Tips for Making Her Feel Connected to You

The best flirting that a guy can do is the kind that really makes a woman feel like she is connected to him. If you want to know why some guys can seem to have nothing but success with women, it is usually because they know how to make a woman feel an instant sense of connection with them. Of course, just knowing that this is something that you want to be able to do doesn't mean that you are actually going to be able to do it. This article is going to show you some tips on how you can flirt with a woman so that she does start to feel a connection with you.

Here are a few tips for flirting effectively with a woman:

1) A shared joke can go a long way towards building rapport with a woman.

If you can, try to find something that you and her have in common that you can joke about. It doesn't have to be the best joke ever, just something that both of you can relate to in a funny way. For example, if you find out that you both have pretty monotonous jobs, that is something that you can joke about and it is something that you both have in common.

2) Connect with her through the eyes.

This really is one of the best ways to make a woman feel like she has made a rare connection with you. If you ask most women, they will almost all say that they do pay attention to a guy's eyes. Thankfully, if you perfect your gaze, you don't have to have those dreamy blue eyes that you think you have to have to really connect with a woman.

3) Use a little physical contact when you are flirting with her.

People that know each other tend to touch each other in certain ways when they are talking. Well, at least if they really feel like they share a connection with one another they will. If you want to make her feel that way when she is around you, don't be afraid to use a little bit of physical contact. Sometimes something as simple as a hand on her shoulder while you are looking at her is all you have to do.

You really do need to know how to flirt with a woman if you are looking to get better in general as far as dating goes. A man who doesn't know how to make a woman feel like she is connected to him is a man who is probably going to be spending some alone time, if you know what I mean.